Online Dating Advice and Tips |

1. Women do NOT like it when you bring up your
ex-girlfriends during the course of conversation. Even if
your intentions are good, they still don’t like it.
2. Checklist to prepare your house/apartment for the
first time you bring the girl you are dating over there:
- Clean toilet
-Vacuum Floors
-Wash comforters/bedsheets
-Empty over-flowing Trashcans
-Hide porn on your computer.
3. Clean your car inside and out before picking
up a girl for a date
4. Have realistic expectations of the women/men
you are trying to attract.
5. If you haven’t dated in a while, go out
and buy yourself some new clothes before
you go out on your first date. Confidence levels
will rise accordingly.
6. If you go out on a blind date/meet someone
off the internet and it just isn’t working for you,
do the honorable thing and tell them as soon as
possible. Don’t string them along.
7. Groom yourself accordingly prior to going
out on date. If you think you might be
“getting some action”, take proper precautions
lest you turn them off for good. Ladies, if
aren’t into the “shaved” look, then try a landing
strip. Small enough to land a Cessna, but not so
big that you can land a Boeing 757. Guys, bust
out the weed whacker. “The Hitler” is a big no-no.
So are smiley faces and other random landscaping
designs.
8. Brush your teeth
9. Guys: for the first few dates, try “rubbing one out”
prior to going out on date. It might save you an
embarrassing bulge when pressing up against her
to hug her good night.
10. Compliments are nice, too many compliments
and it goes from flattery to pandering.
11. Jealously is bad, mmkay?
12. “First date jitters” are completely normal.
Don’t take it as a bad thing. “Fifth date jitters”
and something might be amiss.
13.Don’t judge your date.
14. Going to the movies on a first date
makes for an entertaining experience, but not so good for
getting to know the other person unless you have dinner plans
before or afterwards.
15. Take your time in getting to know your date.
Don’t rush things, it sometimes tends to scare potential mates off.
16. Perceived danger sometimes turns women on.
17.If you make boastful claims, be prepared to
back those claims up.
18.Women love mystery.
19.Men love to be touched playfully.
20.Crotch stuffing is a big no-no.
21.Bra stuffing is a big no-no.
Be proud of what God gave you. Chances are
your date likes the way your body looks.
22.Trim your toenails.
23.Mentally prepare yourself
before you go out on a date.
24.If you find yourself not being
able to go out on as many dates as you would like,
make yourself more socially available. Love comes
when you least expect it.
25.Boat-rides are really romantic
unless your date gets sea-sick.
26.Fuzzy little puppies in a pet
shop will make any woman melt. Unless she likes to
eat said puppies, then she will salivate. Either way,
consider yourself ahead of the game.
27.Chocolate create a chemical
reaction in some female’s brains that is a similar feeling
to love.
28.Don’t be late on a date. If you are,
call ahead to let them know you will be late.
29.Bars are only good to meet people
who want to hook up.
30.Some women get turned on by porn.
31.All men get turned on by porn.
32.Keep the first date short and sweet.
33.When talking to a guy/girl you meet online,
don’t spend hours upon hours talking on the phone or via instant
message. Save some discovery for the actual first date, lest
you run out of things to talk about that you haven’t already talked
about.
34. Alcohol on a first date can lead to hooking up,
just don’t expect a phone call the next day.
35.30% of all women surveyed who met someone
online, have had sex on the first date.
36.“Dating” is just that. Getting to know someone
and learning about them.
37.Be yourself. Don’t pretend to be someone you
are not, just because you happen to think she likes a certain type of guy.
38.Women like guys with big penises
39.Women like guys with small penises
40. Women like penises. Get the idea?
41. Men like boobs.
42.Turn off your cell phone, or at the very least
set it to vibrate.
43.Most first dates go a little something like this:
Meet up, both of you are nervous. Idle chit-chat/small talk, still nervous.
You go home, not nervous anymore. Pretty simple huh?
Don’t psych yourself out over the first date.
44.You may drive a Mercedes and you
may have a 7 figure bank account, but you’re still an asshole.
Don’t brag about yourself. Be modest and she will like you
for you who are, not what you have.
45.Take everything I have told you so far,
and throw it out the window. There are no rules for a successful
first date. Each person is unique and each date you go out on
will be different than the last. What turns one girl on, will turn
another right off. Change your game plan on the fly.
46.Don’t look at other women/guys when
you are out on a date. You may consider it innocent enough,
but what if your date reads it as you being a flirt.
47.Guys: zits on your face can be covered up
by a little foundation. Use too much and you fail.
48.Wash your ass.
49.Try not to say negative things while on
the first few dates.
50.Don’t over-do it on the cologne/perfume.
51.Some people are allergic to pets. Before you
bring your date over to your house, ask your date if they are allergic
and then lock Fido and/or Kittah in the garage.
52.When you first email someone you are interested
in (from an online dating service), keep the first email short and sweet.
Long-winded emails are a no-no. You don’t even know the person yet.
How would you feel if some random person came up to you off the street
and starting rambling on and on then asked you for your number? Capice?
53.These so called “art of pickup” websites that you
see online are full of crap. With one exception. Google “David Wygant”.
No-nonsense approach to picking up women. David has a few videos
on YouTube as well.
54.Make sure the picture you have in your
online dating profile is recent. If it isn’t, then I give you a 50/50
chance of your date ever calling you back once you meet.
55.If you are not happy with your weight
and/or size, try taking a picture from the side or at a funky angle
for your online dating profile.
56.Shirtless/topless pictures in your
online dating profile will only attract one type of person.
57.Too shy to post a picture of yourself
for your online dating profile? Take a digital camera and set
it to “black and white”. Set it at eye-height and step back 5 feet.
Smile. Then take more pics and if someone ask you to post more pics,
tell them that you would rather email them instead.
58.Keep your political views to yourself, unless asked.
59.Don’t talk about sex on the first date.
60. If you run out of things to talk about
on the first/second date, try making observations about the
environment around you. That could lead to an interesting
conversation.
61.Don’t blab on and on about yourself.
Take the opportunity to get to know the person you are with.
62.Women: Don’t overdo it on the makeup/lipstick
63.If you get overly nervous on the first couple
of dates, suggest walking activities. This way you won’t be stuck
having a face to face conversation at a Starbucks table. Instead,
get Starbucks then take a walk around town or down by the beach.
64.If you still find yourself running out of things
to talk about, here are a few suggestions:

- music
- current events
- hobbies
- pet peeves
- favorite places to travel
- craziest thing you have ever done
- name the thing you are most afraid of
- favorite restaurant/pub

65.If you are unsure if you
will like the person you are meeting for the first time,
set a time limit on the date. “Well, I have an hour
free on Saturday, why don’t we meet up at….”
This way, you will have an “out” if your instincts are
correct.
66.NEVER check your dates cell phone
or address book without permission. That goes for the
computer as well.
67.The divorce rate for couples in
Orange County, Ca. is significantly higher than the rest
of the country, so next time you see “Real Housewives
of Orange County” on t.v., take solace in the fact that a good
majority of them will be calling themselves Orange County
Singles soon enough. My point being that money does
not necessarily buy happiness. Choose your date for
who they are, rather than how much they make.
68.Women who date online
generally get taken out to dinner on the first date.
Here are some alternative suggestions to set yourself
apart from the rest:

- Starbucks
- Walk on the Beach
- Window shopping
- Comedy club
- Charity event
- Bike ride through the park
- Rollerskating down by the beach
- Blues club/live music
- Get a tatoo
- Goto a pet shop

69.Before you go out on a first date,
take 1/2 hour to practice deep breathing techniques.
This is a good way to cut down on the nervousness and
will help your brain from drawing a blank when it comes to
conversation.

Online Dating Advice and Tips |